The secret to leadership? DBAJ

I have a confession. Leadership was one of the courses of my MBA that I liked the least. I always found it interesting how much the "leadership" side of business, education, and self-help has really grown. You can even get a masters in leadership now! Everyone claims to have the secret sauce to being a good leader but here's what I think, good leadership boils down four words. Don't. Be. A. Jerk. DBAJ there ya go, I just saved ya thousands of dollars. You're welcome!

Honestly though, think about the leaders you have wanted to follow in your life. Chances are they are people who you made you feel comfortable to ask questions, people who gave you room to grow (and room to fail) and people who were genuinely invested in you and your success. Taking a masters level leadership course was very eye-opening, not because of the articles we read or the ideas we discussed (again...DBAJ), but because of how many people in the classroom disagreed. Many of my peers viewed leadership as almost synonymous with dominance. I lead, you follow. I drive the bus, you get on the bus, and you go where I go. But leadership, is so much more than that. Its about why people follow.

Speaking of synonyms, lets clear one other thing up. Dominance and power are not the same thing. Power is so often spoken about as a nasty, ugly thing. When we think of power we think of people like Trump or Putin. But power is simply the ability influence others, to get people to follow you. Your doctor has power to get you to follow their guidance and treatment plan. Your boss has power to get you to show up to work. Your teachers have power to get you to do your homework. If leaders lead they do it because they have power - and that's not always a bad thing.

Back in 1959, social psychologist French and Raven coined 5 types of power and this research has really stood the test of time so lets quickly review them.

1. Coercive Power: This is the Trump approach. You gain power because you have the ability to punish or apply negative consequences to people who don't follow. You lead by fear.

2. Reward Power: This is often how parents get little ones to do what is needed. Tokens, prizes, rewards, reinforcement. We sweeten the pot a little to get you to do what we want.

3. Legitimate Power: Your boss, a judge, a prime minister. All examples of people who have legitimate power because they are in an organizational position that gives it to them.

4. Expert Power: Your doctor, university professor, or a lawyer would have this one. These are the people who have the knowledge and experience to lead.

5. Referent Power: This is all relational. You follow people with referent power not because you have to, not because you are rewarded, not because you will be punished if you don't. You follow these leaders because you want to. Because you like the person, you respect them and you trust that they are leading you somewhere where you want to go.

As you can see by the definitions, you can have power in any given situation because of any combination of the above. A prime minister, for example, might have legitimate power and expert power. But you may be wondering, if there are different kinds of power, and power isn't inherently bad then which one of them is the most effective? Referent. By far its referent. And how do you gain referent power? DBAJ.

In a world where humility is still often seen as a weakness, it can take courage to lead with kindness and empathy but I truly believe the thing the word needs more of is DBAJ. Want some practical examples on how this is done? Stay tuned, I'll talk about that on my next business blog.

Reference

French, J.R.P. and Raven, B. (1959). 'The Bases of Social Power.' In 'Studies in Social Power, Cartwright, D.,' pp.150-167. Ann Arbor, MI: Institute for Social Research.